Worst Car Names In History

Which names have clanked the loudest into car history's wastebasket?
These are TheCarConnection's 15 contenders:


Ford Probe

In a single stroke, Ford managed to alienate half the potential buyers
of this otherwise not-bad sporty two-plus-two coupe. The unfortunate
connotations bothered many women in the same way that hearing that
banjo theme from Deliverance tends to put most men on edge. Not one of
Ford's better ideas.

Daihatsu Charade

It's not really a car, it's just pretending! This was one of those
econo-boxes that was not merely humiliating to drive, it embarrassed
its owner each time its name was uttered. "I drive a Charade." Good-
bye, prom date! (See also: Ford Aspire.)

Pontiac Aztek

The name's not even spelled correctly, for openers. And it didn't help
matters that the vehicle itself resembled a dumpster on wheels. The
Aztec civilization stood no chance against the ugliness (and
illiteracy) of this General Motors sheetmetal horror show.

Isuzu Big Horn

Sometimes, size really does matter! The associations conjured up here
are surely not what Isuzu intended. That's what happens when things
get lost in translation.

Mazda Protégé

Someday, it hopes to be a real car, we suppose? Tagging your car a
junior partner is forever pegging yourself a Robin, not a Batman. And
who wants to be Robin?

Toyota Yaris

A Toyota what? Maybe it doesn't matter as long as the first name is
there, but Yaris sounds like the noise you'd hear issuing from the
gullet of an exotic animal. Or maybe it is a small animal? (Sorry,
dude, my Yaris left a mess on your rug.)


Mitsubishi Mirage

Hmm, famous mirages. The Flying Dutchman? Cher's musical talent? A
"mirage" is something that's not really there, a figment of your
imagination -- when in distress, especially. Not the hot ticket for a
car name, eh?

Geo Prizm

It doesn't separate light waves, just you from your cash. At least
this thinly disguised, rebadged Toyota Corolla sold by Chevrolet was
an okay car under its goofy nameplate.

Nissan Altima

A made-up word that attempts to evoke positive associations -- in this
case, height/achievement, we think. (See also: Subaru Justy, Toyota
Camry, Olds Alero, Chevy Lumina, etc.)

Pontiac Banshee

This name never reached production, because luckily for Pontiac,
someone consulted a dictionary before the concept escaped GM's design
studios. A Banshee's shriek heralds imminent death, among things -
someone page the liability lawyers!

Dodge Swinger

You'll also find ads for these on the back pages of adult magazines.
Okay, it was the '70s, but still - why not just call it the STD?

AMC Gremlin

Do you really want to own a car named after annoying small problems
that are next-to-impossible to fix? Courtesy of the same folks who
brought you the Pacer.

Mercury Mystique

Way too close to "mistake" for comfort. (A Mercury executive made just
that slip-up at one of the press introductions for this car.) The
third or fourth attempt by Ford to build a "world car" that not even
the U.S. was much interested in.

Volkswagen Touareg

Impossible to pronounce or spell correctly without lessons, this name
takes the cake for being the most gratuitously recondite car name of
the past 30 years - not to mention its unfortunate link to a slave-
trading North African tribe.

Chevy Camaro

This one apparently has double-entendre meanings in other cultures,
such as "shrimp" -- or worse. (See also Chevy Nova; it "doesn't go"
en espanol.)

Anyone have any additions?

Patrick

Nissan Cedric.... based (IIRC) the Humber Hawk...

Datsun... Both the Fairlady and the Bluebird.... not particularly inspiring
or provoking thoughts of power and performance (the Fairlady was a two seat
sporty car.

Borgward Isabella... I recall seeing a TS many years ago and it appeared
that the intake manifold was one and the same as the valve cover - O could
be mistaken but it was extremely odd looking all the same.

Volkswagen Thing.... looked like an escapee from a B grade WW2 movie. I can
almost picture Colonel Klink standing up in the back of one of these...

Most Italian cars ever built..... how can you drive something if you can't
pronounce or spell it's name???

"Jim Warman" > wrote in message
news:2lZuh.4663$Y6.1223@edtnps89...
> Nissan Cedric.... based (IIRC) the Humber Hawk...
>
> Datsun... Both the Fairlady and the Bluebird.... not particularly
> inspiring
> or provoking thoughts of power and performance (the Fairlady was a two
> seat
> sporty car.
>
> Borgward Isabella... I recall seeing a TS many years ago and it appeared
> that the intake manifold was one and the same as the valve cover - O could
> be mistaken but it was extremely odd looking all the same.
>
> Volkswagen Thing.... looked like an escapee from a B grade WW2 movie. I
> can
> almost picture Colonel Klink standing up in the back of one of these...
>
> Most Italian cars ever built..... how can you drive something if you can't
> pronounce or spell it's name???

Chevy Impact.

And, of course, the new G.

G?

dwight

> done said:

> Which names have clanked the loudest into car history's wastebasket?
> These are TheCarConnection's 15 contenders:
>
> Mazda Protégé
>
> Someday, it hopes to be a real car, we suppose? Tagging your car a
> junior partner is forever pegging yourself a Robin, not a Batman. And
> who wants to be Robin?


Yeah, but . . . the Protégé is an entry level vehicle. I've always thought the
name fit. You're a young professional, right out of college, you're not at
Lexus level yet, but you're on your way up. This is the car for you now. I
had a GLC, which was the forerunner of the 323, which was the forerunner of the
Protégé, so maybe I'm biased.


> Nissan Altima
>
> A made-up word that attempts to evoke positive associations -- in this
> case, height/achievement, we think.


I think this model was originally called Stanza, which was another awful name.
The missus has a ten-year old Altima. We bought it new. Good car - silly
name.



- Max -
=======
As Americans we must always remember that we all
have a common enemy, an enemy that is dangerous,
powerful, and relentless. I refer, of course,
to the federal government. - Dave Barry

Cressida Amica Octavia Fabia Tigra Mondeo Xantia Persona Charade Mentor
Applause Scrum Joy-Machine Rampage Demon

<Mazda Protégé

<Someday, it hopes to be a real car, we suppose? Tagging your car a
<junior partner is forever pegging yourself a Robin, not a Batman. And
<who wants to be Robin?

Mazda Protege not a bad name at all. I always thought it was fitting for
that car.


<Geo Prizm

<It doesn't separate light waves, just you from your cash. At least
<this thinly disguised, rebadged Toyota Corolla sold by Chevrolet was
<an okay car under its goofy nameplate.

Another nice name. Nothing wrong here with Prizm

<Nissan Altima

<A made-up word that attempts to evoke positive associations -- in this
<case, height/achievement, we think. (See also: Subaru Justy, Toyota
<Camry, Olds Alero, Chevy Lumina, etc.)

Altima a nonsence word, but dosent sound bad. Just look at the sales
figures. Cant say the name hurt the car. Quite the contrary.

<AMC Gremlin

<Do you really want to own a car named after annoying small problems
<that are next-to-impossible to fix? Courtesy of the same folks who
<brought you the Pacer.

Awww... Come on !!!! What would the US auto industry be without that cute
little Gremlin logo on the car :-)


<Chevy Camaro

<This one apparently has double-entendre meanings in other cultures,
<such as "shrimp" -- or worse. (See also Chevy Nova; it "doesn't go"
<en espanol.)

Even though I prefer Mustangs to Camaros, I just cant think of Camaro being
a bad name by any stretch of the imagination. Way too much juice and
history behind it !!!


I'd like to add....

The Nissan Murano.... Pronounced MORON-OH ... You've got to be kidding
??? What marketing genius came up with this one ??? When ever I see that
name badge on the back of one of them, I cant help wonder who the Moron is.
The man/woman driving it or the idiot that named it.

Michael

> wrote in message
ups.com...

Anyone have any additions?

"HUMMER" conjures up some images that don't seem very "vehicular" in nature.
--
John C.
'03 Cobra Convt.

wrote:
> Which names have clanked the loudest into car history's wastebasket?
> These are TheCarConnection's 15 contenders:
>
>
> Ford Probe
>
> In a single stroke, Ford managed to alienate half the potential buyers
> of this otherwise not-bad sporty two-plus-two coupe. The unfortunate
> connotations bothered many women in the same way that hearing that
> banjo theme from Deliverance tends to put most men on edge. Not one of
> Ford's better ideas.
>

Yeah, probe THIS! MX6 sounded much better.

> Isuzu Big Horn
>
> Sometimes, size really does matter! The associations conjured up here
> are surely not what Isuzu intended. That's what happens when things
> get lost in translation.
>

I'll have to google this one, I thought it was a Dodge truck.


> Mazda Protégé
>
> Someday, it hopes to be a real car, we suppose? Tagging your car a
> junior partner is forever pegging yourself a Robin, not a Batman. And
> who wants to be Robin?

But if you were Robin, even only for a day; then you could shed some
light on this Batman thing. Exactly why was this 16-19 yo do gooder
hanging around with the 40 YO billionaire? Seems like anytime something
happened he was always already at Batman's house. Hmmmm....

>
> Toyota Yaris
>
> A Toyota what? Maybe it doesn't matter as long as the first name is
> there, but Yaris sounds like the noise you'd hear issuing from the
> gullet of an exotic animal. Or maybe it is a small animal? (Sorry,
> dude, my Yaris left a mess on your rug.)
>

I thought it sounded like the noise one makes after Yeagermeister
binge night....

> Dodge Swinger
>
> why not just call it the STD?
>

I think Ford already used that....

> AMC Gremlin
>
> Do you really want to own a car named after annoying small problems
> that are next-to-impossible to fix? Courtesy of the same folks who
> brought you the Pacer.
>

Heh...


--
"One hard rule of sockpuppetry is that a sockpuppet
can't be smarter than its animator."
- Arny Krueger

Jim Warman wrote:
> Nissan Cedric.... based (IIRC) the Humber Hawk...
>
> Datsun... Both the Fairlady and the Bluebird.... not particularly inspiring
> or provoking thoughts of power and performance (the Fairlady was a two seat
> sporty car.
>

Yabut, that's both a Japanese thing and in the way it's translated.
The Fairlady was built by Nissan before it was imported here under the
Datsun name, and I believe it was the orignal name of the Z car and it's
predecessor.

--
"One hard rule of sockpuppetry is that a sockpuppet
can't be smarter than its animator."
- Arny Krueger

John C. wrote:
> > wrote in message
> ups.com...
>
> Anyone have any additions?
>
> "HUMMER" conjures up some images that don't seem very "vehicular" in nature.

That depends on who is riding in your passenger seat.....

--
"One hard rule of sockpuppetry is that a sockpuppet
can't be smarter than its animator."
- Arny Krueger